Date of Award


Document Type

USM Access Thesis

Degree Name

Master of Arts (MA)



First Advisor

Cara Hoffman

Second Advisor

Elizabeth Hand

Third Advisor

Justin Tussing


The Future Is Terrible, But You’re Gonna Love It is a satirical fiction collection made up of three short stories and two novel excerpts. All set in near future, absurdist dystopias, these narratives comment on humanity’s seeming blind trust in new technologies that may very well enslave or destroy them completely. This collection also considers the world from an outsider’s perspective and the insights from that unique point of view, of seeing reality unobscured by insider pretensions.

The first short story, “The Hatchett Nose Debacle,” explores teen angst, sinus infections, mechanized nasal apparatuses, and the notion that you may already have what you seek. “Red Meat” delves into a clash of political ideologies when genetically engineered Marxist meat collides with narcissistic, crony capitalism. “You’re 86’d” imagines a nightmare world run by corporate algorithms and the resulting apathy of human beings to be fed, drugged, and entertained straight to their voluntary deaths. Neo London Blues is a bio-punk thriller noir following the antics of a misanthropic, fugitive human hybrid. Sex, drugs, rock ‘n’ roll, and the nature of duality drive this international corporate intrigue, and its main characters’ need to escape it all. Finally, Anonymous is about seeking worth in a world of collapsed meaning caused by monopolistic online retailers, isolation, and systemic debt.

At its core, this collection of stories posits the idea that even the most hopeless worlds and situations may be redeemable in truly unexpected ways.


This is a record is restricted to USM access only.